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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23357278">Conflagrant Graze</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evenseven/pseuds/Evenseven'>Evenseven</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Stoke the Baptism of Fire [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Gomorra - La Serie | Gomorrah (TV), L'Immortale | The Immortal (2019)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Author Is Sleep Deprived, Canon Divergence, English translation, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Post-Canon, Shower Sex, Spoilers for the flim, but more fluff</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 10:35:56</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,586</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23357278</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evenseven/pseuds/Evenseven</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He was not afraid of the darkness, but only feared to catch a glance of hope in the darkness that should had been everlasting and miserable.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ciro Di Marzio/Gennaro "Genny" Savastano</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Stoke the Baptism of Fire [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1389064</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Conflagrant Graze</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>For a friend, good to know the fandom is alive :)<br/>Also thanks for all of you...and stay safe my friends! I spend my quarantine (thinking about) writing fanfic and rewatching Gomorra. What can I say, I have a tattoo about it so bear with me...</p><p><a href="https://secretlovecorner.lofter.com/post/2060136c_1c889604f">中文原文</a>&amp;欢迎找我玩 Lofter@Time Tricker</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sometimes he would miss the warmth, not that Riga is unbearably cold, it’s just that he couldn’t really remember the last time he was held by a pair of warming arms. If that year in Bulgaria made him get used to the cold, coming back to Naples afterwards felt like a total relapse. Needless to say, it felt even worse than before. Ciro had tried to cut it off all again, hiding in some dark corners of a grimy motel or sealing himself under the frozen water of the gulf—none of it worked. Like fighting the inevitable, some god damn part inside of his chest was still screaming for warmth and attention, even for just a split second, even if he would regret afterwards, that part of him was still searching for a sensation of belonging, a sensation of being needed by someone.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He would always long for the warmth and would always regret it.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The rest and lager part of Ciro would always remind him that he didn’t deserve even a slight fraction of warmth, no matter where it might come from. Whoever came close to him would be torn apart and dead, it’s something he had realized for a long time. Almost completely isolated himself in Riga, he knew that loneliness and cold would be his only companies.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">L’immortale was not a gift, but an interminable curse, a punishment he couldn’t escape. God was punishing him by the only thing he couldn’t stand, and it’s not poverty, humiliation or death, but loneliness.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He sought for the warmth, until it’s finally within reach, only till then did he realize again he never deserve any of that, especially not from Genny.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ciro didn’t know what would happen or what could he expect, but when he brought Genny back to his little apartment in Riga and the other man’s breath was so close to his face, hesitation was too again within reach.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It’s only a matter of second before the illusion snapped and his shoulders were slammed on the living room wall by the young Secondigliano boss. A groan was knocked out of his chest as Genny pressed his body up against him, a cruel warning to remark that he had nowhere to escape.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ciru’,” his voice was dangerously low, “you got something to tell me?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I miss you. I miss home. I am sorry.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ciro had so much to say so he said nothing. He knew that Genny had all the reasons to be pissed, if a bloody rotten head in a box didn’t give sufficient proof, the way he’s grinning his teeth and the sharp breath certainly did.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He survived the water and didn’t tell Gennaro. It would be a lie if he say he had never thought of returning to Naples, but Don Aniello persuaded him to work for his trade in another side of Europe with only one sentence.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Gennaro Savastano had left his past behind, and your returning will only ruin the effect he made.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He just needed a reason to escape, and the business in Riga gave him this exact excuse to leave. Of course he would ruin Gennaro, that he didn’t need anyone else to enlighten. And he knew how much family could change one person, speaking from personal experience. So he made the choice for Genny, just like every time before. He made choices for him years ago to manipulate Genny for himself, but now purely for his only brother, the only man in the world he cared about.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The same man he had betrayed, shot, and kissed.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He wanted to tell him how much he missed him, but he just couldn’t.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ciro evaded his eyes thinking how cold and detached this gesture could seem, and it doubtlessly fueled his anger. Wave of irritation burned through the air as Genny ponded his fist on the wall right besides his head, making a wham loud enough to shake the windows. He could feel his ears burning red, half in fear, half from such intimate distance.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Look at me!” Gennaro snarled in his face, “How can you even…think that I will forgive you just like this?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Right the opposite, Ciro wasn’t brave enough to meet his gaze, I don’t think you’ll ever forgive me at all.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The longer he kept silence, the deeper Genny’s eyes turned. “Why didn’t you tell me you’re alive? Why did you come to this shit place where the sun never set? Why did you…lie to me?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Genna’…Tell me this, why are you here?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I…! What do you think? Ciru’, why do you think I came all the way to this shithole? For who?” Ciro finally lifted his head and caught the sight of Genny’s red-rimmed eyes, “You just left me like that!…Until I heard the rumors saying you’re still fucking alive, that you’re working for someone else thousands miles away, that you have…”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I can still be dead, in your head.” He tried to keep his voice steady but it’s much more difficult than he thought.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You made me think I killed you!” Gennaro grabbed his collar and slammed him on the wall again, the physical difference between them had never been so obvious like now. Maybe it’s true that he had lost way too much weight in Riga this past year, but standing in the shadow of Gennaro made every cell inside his body urge for abscond. “You made me carry this all alone, and just ran away like this? What a fucking dickhead you are! I could never stop thinking about you, then I heard those rumors. How could I not come here to check for myself? How could I not come to find you and tell you how much I…”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Why did you think I ask you to shoot?” He tasted the anger at the back of his tongue, “You think I like this place? Fuck, I did everything for you! Genna’, I can’t ruin you at the end like I did to everyone else…”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“But you can’t make my choice for me!” The younger man’s lips almost brush through his cheekbone, Ciro realized those red eyes may not solely result from rage, “You’ve done what you have to do, now it’s my time to make things right. I need to take you home, Ciru’, nothing can separate us anymore and you know that. I’ve been walking the line my whole life, and you’re the risk I’m willing to take…Whatever it is, as long as you’re by my side.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ciro was speechless, those dark eyes in front of him flickered only for a second, the next thing he knew was Genny’s lips on his. He just couldn’t describe how much he missed this particular feeling, the feeling of surrounded by the warmth of Genny’s arms. The kiss was too gentle, pressing on his bottom lip in almost delicate way. He hesitated, but Genny’s bread picking his chin felt more like a reminder of the situation in hand gave no time for hesitation. So he responded with a kiss in between passion and desperation, allowing Genny’s tongue reaching everywhere in his mouth. A kind of bittersweet intimacy he had not feel in over a year.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Endless days and nights, sleepless nights and days.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He had sacrificed everything, yet now he’s vacillated because of a kiss.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Genna’…”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Don’t discourage me any more, Ciru’,” there was somehow more pleading than commanding in Genny’s hoarse voice, “I know what I want, and something…Someone, is just more important than the whole wild world.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ciro’s eyes fell on the scar on Genny’s cheek, his thumb pressed against the darker mark as he sensed the skin underneath burning up. He couldn’t help but think about how much Genny and Enzo absolutely hated each other, yet they claimed about the same thing.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">There were some things he never had doubt on, like the distinctive connection he had with Genny, burned hotter than flame and blood; like he knew it from the bottom of his heart that he never could leave everything behind as he professed to; like he’s the savage poison that could kill a man in one touch, yet it never obstructed anyone from trying.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“‘m sorry…” Though it couldn’t undo any damage, it’s the best apology he could form.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He knew he couldn’t take it if he would to lose everything again, but it never obstructed him from trying, burning himself in the last whisper of hope and affliction.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Genny’s kisses landed on his ear, stoped for a moment at his earring, then wandered down the line of his neck. Everywhere his lips touched, it hurt, but more important than that, it’s warm. A subtle reminder to tell Ciro that he’s still alive, that he could still <em>feel</em> the pain.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I—” The buttons on his shirt popped ad the young man’s bread scrubbed against his collarbone, the raising temperature sucked the oxygen out of his body, so he cleared his throat, “I really need a shower…”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Shower…with me…” Genny’s voice vibrated on his skin, and it felt more and more like a distant memory, gradually became unrealistic under the sleepless sunshine of Riga leaking under the curtain.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It felt like a dream.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">*</span>
</p><p class="p1"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ciro never knew that this tiny shower cabin was possible to cram in two large ass grown men, but with his forehead pressing against the slippery wet shower wall and Genny bitting every inch of the skin on his shoulder, nothing seemed impossible anymore. Hot steam climbed up his eyelashes till clear drops cemented, his panting buried by the wound of flowing water. Shower washed away the gunpowder smell on him, but couldn’t take away tobacco scent in his breath. He was insensitive to the cigarette smell on himself since forever, and he only noticed it when he realized it was a whiff that could rarely be found on Gennaro.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">As now, the tobacco scent was more distinctive than ever, along with the bitter taste of cigarette on the back of his tongue.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He had thought that a year-long dry spell would make this much harder, but the fact was when he felt the hardening cock of Genny as their bodies pressed together, he also felt himself easily opening up for the young man’s fingers. “A natural bitch.” He heard a voice hissed inside his head, but all he could do was holding on to the slippery shower wall and trying to control his breath.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ciro didn’t form a word, but the way his hip backing up on Genny’s was already the best invitation.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The pain was chocking on Ciro as that fat cock pushed all the way inside him, but it also enlightened the excitement all over his spine. He liked this kind of pain, just for the fact that it proved he could still feel a fraction of reality and pleasure, through the darkness and dullness of this world.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He barely had anything left to give, so he knew he wouldn’t refuse if Genny wanted to take some remuneration from his body.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He couldn’t swallow back the groaning of pain, but his shivering fingers grabbed the wet hair on the back of Genny’s head, telling him to move with intermittent syllables.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Fuck me harder, he heard himself saying.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“God, ” Genny’s voice became even lower than before, his teeth found its way back to the elder man’s earlobe, “Ciru’…You are so tight…” His fingers grasping on Ciro’s hip were powerful enough to left dark marks, but none of them cared as he pulled his precum and water lubed cock all the way back and rammed inside again only harder. If not his strong arms holding around him like a secure hug, Ciro would had fallen onto the ground under this fierce force.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ciro felt his own cock hardening in pleasure, and the other man seemed to read his mind as he found a hand jerking himself at the same pace as the thrusting. It was almost too much so that he forgot those shameless moans actually came from his own mouth.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It felt like he was high on something hardcore, because every part of his body was heated up like a flame cutting through him, tearing him apart but with ecstasy. Everything in his sight became so vivid yet distant, and it only grew worse as Genny bumped into something inside him that made his knees shaking. Ciro didn’t know what he had said to make Genny moved with even more enthusiasm, and their shallow pants combined in the moist hot air. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Empty vassal filled by dazzling warmth. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Genny captured Ciro’s lips with his own, and Ciro just couldn’t hold back the glee and cummed with a quivering grunt, sealing the rest of all the moaning into Genny’s mouth.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Even just for a split second, this gleaming warmth was beautiful enough for Ciro to forget those restless days and nights in Latvia.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Savored the poison, though he had been warning himself way too often that this graceful hope never belonged to him. And under layers and layers of self-hatred, there was still a god damn pitiful part burning inside him, telling him that nothing mattered as long as he held onto this flimsy hope.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Genna’…why…” Ciro just realized the hot water running down his cheeks was not from the shower head, and he hated how pathetic he sounded right now, “Why are you doing this? Why are you giving me this vain hope again?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">I love you, and I hate you for making me love you so much. He might never said these words, but he had said the same to himself in those sleepless nights over and over again.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He was not afraid of the darkness, but only feared to catch a glance of hope in the darkness that should had been everlasting and miserable.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“This time it won’t be in vain, Ciru’, I…You have seen my heart, and I’ve seen yours.” Genny whispered on his lips, shooting his load deep inside Ciro with a groan. His left hand clambered up his ribs and stopped right on top of that scar, in which scored under the name of Gennaro Savastano, “I can’t stop thinking about you, Ciro, and will never be able to. Next time you decide to leave me, please take away all my memories as well.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">At least Gennaro doesn’t know I’m crying, Ciro thought as he ended the utterance with another kiss. Of course he knew that it’s purely absurd and selfish to let the other man carry all the memories alone, because he could never let it go himself. And he was much more timorous and pitiful than Genny, to rather die than fighting against the unbearable suffering alone. He could never forget, thus he had no place to ask him to forget.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The belonged to each other and only complete when together.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Bring me home,” his hand clutched on the back of Genny’s hand, feeling his own heartbeat through their palms, vigorous and tangible for the first time since he came back to life, “bring me back to where we once belonged.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ciro’s eyes met the inky ones, they’re so ravishing and bright even through the hot steam, exactly identical to those in his memory.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">If even the flame of hell couldn’t devour him, then he would be willing to linger in this world for a particular someone only, and the name of that man would be engraved on his left chest, though it was never divulged with words.</span>
</p>
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